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12 min 07 sec
Available in:English

The Score That Matters: Growing Excellence in Yourself and Those You Lead

Shows how to measure yourself by your own values and daily behaviors instead of rankings and targets, and how leaders can build teams that improve by focusing on process over the final score.

Table of Content

If every win at work only raises next quarter’s target, you know how tiring it is to chase a number that keeps moving. In The Score That Matters, basketball coach Brook Cupps and leadership podcaster Ryan Hawk argue for keeping a different score: one that measures whether your daily behavior matches your own values. When Cupps stopped setting win targets for his high school team, it went on to take the school’s first state title.

That idea runs through the whole book. Excellence, the authors claim, grows from standards you set and actions you control, repeated in ordinary moments, and leaders who live this way raise the people around them. Along the way come a football coach who refused to dwell on a crushing defeat, a soccer team that cleaned its locker room after a historic upset, and a ceramics class where the students chasing perfection made the worse pots. The result is a way to turn vague ambition into a few tracked behaviors you can start on Monday.

A record broken today becomes tomorrow’s minimum. A high school coach dropped win targets entirely, and the season that followed suggests outside goals may hold teams back more than they push them forward.

After a crushing defeat, reporters wanted Bill Belichick to explain what had gone wrong. He refused, every single time, and a simple formula shows why that refusal opened a championship season.

Waiting in a parked car or a checkout line feels like time lost. A phrase borrowed from Jerry Seinfeld, garbage time, suggests these overlooked minutes hold much of the raw material of a good life.

Many teams claim respect and accountability as values. One national soccer team proved it with towels and paper cranes, after a famous win and a painful loss alike, and that pattern is the real test.

Two groups of art students had a month to make pots. One aimed for a single perfect piece. The judges’ verdict challenges how most of us set goals at work.

An NBA shooter once added 25 seconds to an ice bath on purpose. His routine, and a two-step exercise from the authors, shows how to turn a vague ideal into something you can check every day.

The book’s quiet claim is that the scoreboard you choose decides how you feel about your own life. Keep score by revenue, records and followers, and every success simply resets the target. Keep score by whether you acted on your values today, and the measure stays in your hands, even on the day you lose.

That is why the stories fit together. Belichick turned straight to Cincinnati, the Japanese players folded their towels after both triumph and heartbreak, and the potters who made more pots made better ones. None of them waited for a result to tell them how they were doing.

For you, the practical start is small. Write down the few qualities that define excellence in your work, and give each one a daily action you can tick off. When something goes wrong, separate the event from your response before you answer. And count the dull minutes as part of the score too: the parked car, the checkout line, the water coming to the boil.

Cupps never asked his team for a winning streak. He asked them to meet every chance with purpose, and the streak reached 45.

About this book

What is this book about?

Sales targets, rankings, personal bests and follower counts all promise to tell us how well we are doing. Ryan Hawk and Brook Cupps, a former quarterback turned leadership podcaster and a championship high school basketball coach, argue that these outside scores keep moving and can leave even successful people feeling empty. Their answer is an internal scoreboard, an idea they trace to Andrew Carnegie's judge within. It asks whether your actions match your values and standards, whatever the result. The authors build it from four habits: giving full attention to the present moment, choosing your response to events, turning values into visible daily behaviors, and setting goals around process rather than outcomes. Their examples come from sport and the classroom, including Bill Belichick's Patriots, Japan's World Cup team, a ceramics class experiment and JJ Redick's off-season routine. Readers get a simple exercise for translating the qualities that matter in their field into behaviors they can track, plus a view of leadership in which those standards spread from one person to a whole team.

Book Information

Rating:

Genre:

Management & Leadership, Personal Development

Topics:

Discipline, Purpose, Values

Publisher:

BenBella Books

Language:

English

Narrator:

Hannah

First published:

March 26, 2024

Pages:

256

Length:

12 min 07 sec

Get the book:

Amazon

Who it's for

  • Managers and team leads

    Managers and team leads who want their people to improve without living and dying by quarterly numbers.

  • Coaches, athletes and ex-competitors

    Coaches, athletes and former competitors looking for a healthier way to hold high standards.

  • High achievers left unsatisfied

    High achievers who keep hitting targets and still feel the satisfaction vanish within days.

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About the Author

Ryan Hawk

Brook Cupps has coached high school basketball for more than 20 years and has won several Coach of the Year awards. His Centerville High School boys team in Ohio won the school's first state basketball title in 2021, and he helped the North Coast Blue Chips win national AAU titles in 2014 and 2019. He writes weekly on coaching at Blue Collar Grit. Ryan Hawk hosts The Learning Leader Show, where he has interviewed more than 450 experts on leadership. A former quarterback and team captain, he rose to vice president of sales at a multibillion-dollar company and wrote Welcome to Management.

Ratings & Reviews

Ratings at a glance

4.8

Overall score based on 16 ratings.

What people think

Listeners find that this title provides carefully considered insights that assist them in processing complicated ideas and developing into more effective leaders. Furthermore, the content is straightforward to understand and keeps the audience engaged, featuring practical activities following every chapter. They also value the emphasis on cultivating excellence, prioritizing quality, and increasing output, with one listener highlighting the way it disputes typical views on success.

Top reviews

Udom

Finally got around to finishing 'The Score That Matters' and it is a total game-changer for anyone managing a team. Ryan Hawk and Brook Cupps manage to bridge the gap between locker room grit and boardroom strategy with real grace. To be fair, I initially thought it might be too focused on high school basketball, but the lessons on internal alignment are universal. The exercises at the end of each chapter actually force you to sit down and confront your own values. It reminds me a bit of the old-school John Wooden philosophy but updated for a world that is obsessed with shallow metrics. If you are tired of the constant comparison game on social media, this provides a much-needed mental reset. My only small gripe is that a few of the sports anecdotes went on a bit long, but the payoff is worth it.

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Bae

Wow, this really hit home for me during a particularly stressful season at work. We often measure our lives by the wrong metrics—promotions, bank accounts, or titles—but Hawk and Cupps argue for a deeper kind of fulfillment. The chapter on using fear as a catalyst for growth was particularly eye-opening for me personally. It is not just about being a better boss; it is about becoming a more integrated human being who lives in alignment with their values. I appreciated the vulnerability in the writing style, especially when discussing the hardships of leadership. Look, it is not a quick fix that will change your life overnight, but it gives you the roadmap you need to start the journey. This is the kind of book you will want to highlight and return to every single year.

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Scarlett

After hearing about Coach Cupps’s success with his teams, I was eager to see his philosophy laid out on paper. This book is a transformational guide that challenges everything we think we know about achievement. The collaboration between a coach and a leadership expert like Ryan Hawk creates a really balanced viewpoint. They emphasize that the most important score isn't on the scoreboard, but rather how well you are living in alignment with your purpose. In my experience, most leadership books are all theory and no heart, but this one has plenty of both. It is well-structured and serves as a useful resource for anyone looking to make a difference in their community. Reading this might just be the start of a major metamorphosis in how you lead others.

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Gai

Picked this up on a recommendation and I am so glad I did. 'The Score That Matters' is a masterclass in how to think through complex thoughts and arrive at a place of clarity. The authors do a great job of explaining why we often feel empty even after reaching major milestones. By focusing on the internal score, you naturally become a better leader and a more productive team member. I loved how they integrated Brook Cupps’s coaching style with Ryan Hawk's broad leadership knowledge. The tone is encouraging but firm, pushing the reader to stop comparing themselves to others. It is an easy-to-follow roadmap for anyone who wants to embrace quality in every aspect of their life. Highly recommended for managers at any level.

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Lillian

Stop what you're doing and buy this book if you care about personal growth. It is rare to find a book that manages to be both highly practical and deeply philosophical at the same time. Hawk and Cupps have created something special here that challenges the status quo of modern achievement. The focus on living by your principles rather than chasing titles is something we all need to hear more often. Not gonna lie, it made me rethink my entire approach to my career and how I interact with my family. It is a relatively quick read but the impact stays with you long after you turn the final page. This belongs on the shelf next to the greats like Wooden and Covey.

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Boy

Ever wonder why you feel unfulfilled even when you are winning by everyone else's standards? This book provides the answer by redefining what success actually looks like in our day-to-day lives. The authors argue that true fulfillment comes from internal alignment rather than external scores or validations. I particularly enjoyed the section on using fear to grow, which felt like a very fresh perspective compared to the usual 'conquer your fear' tropes. The anecdotes are engaging and the writing style is smooth enough to finish over a single weekend. It reminds me of the best parts of Coach Dobson’s style but applied to the modern professional landscape. Whether you are a coach, a CEO, or just someone trying to improve, there is something valuable here for you.

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Lek

As a long-time listener of Ryan’s podcast, I had high expectations for this book and it largely delivered. It is a solid manual for anyone trying to cultivate excellence without losing their soul in the process. The way Cupps discusses his coaching philosophy feels very grounded and authentic. Truth is, some of the business jargon felt a little heavy-handed in the middle sections, which might alienate readers working in the arts or non-profits. However, the core message about prioritizing your 'internal scoreboard' over external validation is incredibly timely. It is easy to get caught up in productivity hacks, but this book asks you to look at the 'why' behind the 'what.' The layout is clean and the advice is actually easy to put into practice immediately. Definitely a worthwhile addition to any leadership library.

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Supachai

This book provides a much-needed perspective shift on what it actually means to be successful in the modern world. Instead of chasing external scores, the authors push you to develop a robust internal framework. I found the sections on emotional regulation and resilience to be the most helpful for my current career path. Gotta say, the writing style is very accessible and the chapters move at a brisk pace. It is a refreshing departure from the typical 'hustle culture' books that dominate the shelves these days. While some of the advice feels familiar if you’ve read a lot of leadership literature, the specific framing here is unique enough to justify the read. It is about growing excellence from the inside out and I think most people would benefit from it.

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Araya

The premise of the book is fantastic, but the execution felt a bit repetitive at times. I picked this up because I enjoy Ryan Hawk’s insights on leadership, but I struggled with the heavy emphasis on sports coaching anecdotes throughout the chapters. If you aren’t a fan of basketball or the AJ Hawk connection, some of the stories might fall flat for you. Not gonna lie, I found myself skimming the middle sections because the same points about internal validation were made repeatedly. That said, the actionable exercises at the end of the chapters are the real gold here. They provide a structured way to think through complex leadership challenges. It is a decent read for a specific audience, but it might not resonate as deeply with those outside of business or sports circles.

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Chon

I really wanted to like this, but it felt like a lot of common sense dressed up in fancy leadership terminology. To be fair, the authors clearly know their stuff, but I didn't find many profound insights that I hadn't heard before in other podcasts or blogs. The heavy focus on sports coaching made it hard for me to relate as someone working in the healthcare field. Frankly, the 'metamorphosis' promised on the back cover felt a bit hyperbolic for what is essentially a book about setting better personal goals. If you love Ryan Hawk’s work, you will probably enjoy it, but for a casual reader, it might feel a bit dry. I did appreciate the exercises, but they weren't enough to save the experience for me.

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Questions about this book

Ryan Hawk and Brook Cupps argue that outside scores such as sales targets, records and rankings keep moving and rarely bring lasting satisfaction. They propose an internal scoreboard, inspired by Andrew Carnegie’s judge within, that measures whether your behavior matches your own values and standards. Excellence then comes from presence, chosen responses, visible values and process goals, practiced daily.

It stands for events plus response equals outcome. You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control how you respond, and the response shapes the result. The authors use a driver who is cut off in traffic: raging and tailgating leads one way, breathing and keeping distance leads another. They link this to having an internal locus of control.

A teacher graded half his class on one best pot and the other half on making a pot every day for thirty days. The best pots all came from the quantity group, who learned from each attempt while the quality group planned the perfect piece. The authors use it to argue that process goals often beat outcome goals.

Identify the two or three qualities that define high performance in your field, then turn each into a specific daily behavior you can track. A sales team valuing product knowledge might read one industry report every morning. Measure yourself by whether you keep those behaviors, not only by quarterly results, and respond to setbacks by focusing on what you control.

It suits leaders, coaches and high achievers who feel trapped by targets that keep rising, and anyone who wants their values to show up in daily behavior. Team leads get an exercise they can run with a group, and athletes get examples from the Patriots, Japan’s World Cup team, David Taylor and JJ Redick.

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The Score That Matters

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